Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Lesbian in McDonald's




My work is light this month so I get a lunch break from 12-1. I drive to any nearby junk food restaurant and eat the food that I always advise my patients against eating. Yesterday I went to a McDonald's and I sat on a table-for-four so I can find a place to put a newspaper and read it.

After a while I noticed that that the place was full despite its large size, and that my US Today was occupying the place of some of the people standing up waiting for a place to sit down. I saw a lady standing in front me me with her back to my side. I was about to remove the newspaper and ask her to sit down but as she turned around I hesitated to do so. The reason was her T-shirt, with the flag of "Gay Pride" printed on it. I didn't do anything for ten seconds as many ideas were running through my head, then I removed the newspaper to let her sit down.

I felt guilty for their situation. I am against homsexuality, not only because I'm Chrisitan but also because of my culture and my belief that homosexuality can threaten the foundation of a family which is the basic unit in the foundation of an adherent society. However I don't see it socially more harmful than extramarital relationships, and religiously not more "sinful" than a guy sleeping with his girlfriend even if they are in love. A sin is a sin.

On the other hand I'm totally against discriminating against homosexuals or calling them names, and that explained the feeling of guilt of my attitude towards that woman. I'm against judging people and even if I believe that woman was committing a sin she might have lied much less than I did, she might have done more charity than I did and she might end up in a better place than I will after she dies.

The simple teaching is to learn to treat people as you like to be treated. I treated that woman like a black man being denied the right to sit in he White Man section back before the 1960s. I considered the newspaper more important than her and that is very dehumanizing.
It's challenging to know that a certain person is doing things which are wrong in your opinion and who are totally different than you and still manitain your respect for them. But what else can differentiate us from animals?

12 comments:

bassel said...

I had a similar situation when i was in france, i met an italian guy in the gym, it was the first time that a guy would start the conversation with me and not a girl, as an arab, i didn't notice since here it's just guys in the gym!!!
so after a while he started coming to my appartment, and he was so nice, nut then we were talking, one thing here and one thing there, and ooops, he tells me he's gay. well..as you said ..10 seconds of silence, and then tried to argue (assuming i'm the good fellow)that homosexuality is wrong, so he told me that he already has a boyfriend, and that no one knows, so i shouldn't tell anybody about it. later on, i told him i don't want us to meet anymore..after 3 years, if the same situation happens again, i'll NOT do the same thing, cause he's still a human being, wether i like it or not.it's when it goes public that it turns into an epidemin......

one other thing..in all my 7 months trip, i met 3 italian guys and all of them where gays...a coincidence?

Natalia said...

Homosexuals comprise less that 10% of the world's population. How they can threaten anyone is something I don't quite get.

Nevertheless, Hareega, I do believe you're one of the few anti-homosexual Christians I can truly say I respect, because of your introspection.

ma3en said...

Was materazzi one of them??

LOL I know it's irrelevant now but I couldn’t help mention it, anywayz, I think it's okay to end your relationship with that man, not because he is a gay, but maybe because deep inside, you wont feel comfortable around him anymore, as he might be or become attracted to you at some level, it's better to avoid such situation from the beginning.

hamede said...

:)

Linda said...

Fares,

WHile I am sure we do not share the same ideasabout gays, I truly do appreciate your candidness about your experience. I think it is wonderful that while you may not agree with someones life style, you still see them as a human being. I wish there were more people like you! :)

Inasiemesh said...

First of, I don't know where this notion of the family being the cornerstone of society comes from? The family unit, starting with marriage is nothing more than a hetro-normative bourgeois construction whose ultimate goal is to preserve capital through lineage. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but I get quite annoyed when people portray the family unit as this sort of idealistic almost pastoral image. It's not. There are of course many positive elements associated with the family. It's effectiveness and dare I say efficiency in furthering the evolution, prosperity and development of society is highly questionable.

What is the difference between a married couple and a couple engaged in pre-marital sexual and emotional relations with a commitment except a piece of paper from the ministry of the interior that informs you that you are married. In terms of Religion, the only difference is that said couple must engage in some archaic ritual involving som rather obscenely sexist narration. If you eliminate the state bureacracy and the imam/priest, how does a couple that is unmarried differ from a couple that is married if the former are in a serious and exclusive relationship. Absolutely nothing. Why must we as individuals seek the permission of the state to get married or the permission of some priest/imam/guru etc.

eyad said...

You know Fares, sometimes it was v. difficult to me to accept those whom I disagree with,but by time,I realised this is life, we can't force our beliefs on others,I think you who live in the west, can learn tolerance better than us here in general.

Hareega said...

Iniasiemesh.... For you, religion doesn't seem that important. For me it is, and when it comes to having a family a couple cannot live together if they are not married. When they get married they share responsibilities that they could not have shared (according to religion) before marriage. A couple for me is a male and female becuase both are different. They should have equal rights but they are different the children's perosnalitites are affected by each of them. That is the "perfect" family for me even though it might not be often a realisitc option in some parts of the world.

kozo said...

While a black person was born black, a gay is gay by choice, and if you think that this person might end up in a better place than you then you really must have done some bad things in your life.
They dont have the right to be treated equally, and you know what differentiate animals from them, it is the fact that animals have enough self respect to prevent them from doing what they do.

Anonymous said...

Well...u can't just simply judge the bitch as being lesbian just for wearing a bloody T-shirt with the flag of fagets u know, did u ask her wether she understands the meaning of that flag she's wearing? i've seen many many people in the arab world wearing, and using symbols, without them knowing the true meaning of them...they just blindly, and stupidly copycat

Lara said...

Nice post, very nice things you said about that issue,the part about judging her & she might be better than us i couldn't agree more.

Bassel lol, it took u 3 years!

From my experience, i met a German gay, very sweet guy! I guess I have nothing to worry about :)

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