Funny Clips From The World Clip

Fabio Capello almost getting a heart attack while yelling at his English players to pass the ball!

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Eboue, the Ivory Coast player, pretending to be listening to the North Korean coach who was giving instructions to one of his players



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This is before the world cup kicked in. Diego Maradona, during training, divided his team into 2 teams to play against each other. The team that lost had to stand on the goal and let the winning team shoot balls at their butts. Maradona stood with the losing team!

Have You Seen This?

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In case you haven't, make sure you see this too, Maxi 2006



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And since you're here, watch this Messi magic, 2007 Copa America



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All of these goals, ladies and gentleman, were against Mexico.

Argentina is a worse nightmare for Mexicans than Arizona's new immigration law.

VAMOS ARGENTINA

Arrivederci

USA-Algeria

That was about to become the best 0-0 game in the World Cup.

Even though Algeria had good chances, but they lacked a striker. They failed to score in the 3 games they played. Even in the 5 last games they had before the World Cup, they only scored one goal from a penalty kick against UAE. Problems don't fix themselves, and the lack of scoring ability paralyzed them in this World Cup.

The US wanted to win so badly and they did. It was totally deserved. Dempsey scored a goal that was wrongfully disallowed due to an offside that did not exist.

Anyway, Arabs are out from the first round, which is the rule.

Enjoy the goal:

Closing Time, First Round

* South Africa will go in history as the first country ever to host a world cup and fail to qualify past the first round. I don't care that they played well against France: they sucked in the 2 other games and that's why they are out by now.

* Portugal doesn't have a great team. I know they won 7-0, but they still don't have a great team, average at best.

* The whole continent of South America should qualify automatically to the World Cup next time, including Suriname and French Guyana.

* Domenech, the French coach, refused to shake hands with South Africa's coach after the end of the game, proving again that he is extremely rude even by French standards. (clip below)

* Red cards are the new yellow.

* I get very nervous when I see Argentina playing a great game. If they wanna win the world cup they have to attack for 10 minutes and score a goal then spend the remaining 80 minutes with 10 players in defense.

* Stop saying you're shocked by England's poor performance. Just do like me and don't put England among world class team. So not qualifying to Euro 2008 or getting knocked off early in the World Cup becomes a very normal thing. Drawing with Algeria and the US? Sounds perfectly normal to me.

The Mundial Kid

I was on the phone with a Paraguayan friend who was on his way to South Africa to watch the World Cup.

"When are you leaving?"

"Today, I'll fly from New York to Dubai then Johannesburg, just to watch 4 games then will be back in 10 days"

"Why don't you stay all the way?"

"Wife is pregnant, she's due in 3 weeks, I wanna make sure I'm back before that"

"Awesome!! Have fun!!"

"I will"

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24 hours later he was calling.

"I wanna tell you that we now have a new member added to our family"

"What?"

"My wife just had a baby boy, they're both doing great, he's a little underweight, but otherwise doing great"

"This is great, where are you now?"

"Dubai"

"Can you go back to New York?"

"Maybe, I think I can , but you know, I bought 4 tickets, it's the World Cup....."

"I know, listen..."

"What?"

"When your son grows up, he will understand"

"That's what I'm saying to myself"

"Congratulations"

"Thank You"

"Take pictures"

"I will"

I used to respect my friend. Now I respect him much more.

MicroBloGGinG..... World Cup Edition.... Lidd Lidd Chaif Enno, Chaif Akhathel Taba Minno

-You cannot judge how the World Cup will end just from its beginning. A lot of teams that won the world cup lost their opening games or even barely made it to the second round. This is not the NBA, baseball, or fake American football.

- I thought Argentina played very well. A lot of players didn't give all what they had, and the defence was in poor shape. Higuain needs to concentrate more. Zanetti and Riquelme were definitely missing, but Zanetti was there for 4 World Cups and we didn't win anything with him.

Maradona has matured a lot in the last year as a coach. The next time a game ends 6-1 it has to be a win on our side!

- So far South Korea played the best game ever. They dominated Greece. If they stay in this shape they might do really well even without help from the referees.

- The US has a good team. However they will never win the World Cup if they keep calling this game soccer. Sorry, but your "football" lost. The world likes the real football where players play with their feet, not helmet ball where players play with their helmets.

here are some moments for Messi against Nigeria:

24 years later

It won't be a problem waiting for 4 more years, but it would be wonderful to get it now, with the greatest human being on the face of the planet as the coach.

Good luck boys

Vamos Argentina

Best Red Card Ever in a World Cup

1990: Claudio Caniggia, the great Argentinian striker, was running at a speed of a Toyota with faulty breaks towards Cameron's goal. One Cameronian guy tackled him a little, another one jumped on him and tackled him more, and the third one (Massinga) just frikin threw himself at Caniggia and threw him on the floor.

Watch out the shoe flying in the air with the attack!!

England, Three Pussy Cats on a Shirt

The British invented football, but their contribution to the game stopped there. They refused to participate in the World Cup up until 1950, only to get defeated by the US 1-0 on their first game ever. Since then, their participation has been less than perfect. They won the Cup they hosted in 1966, but other than the only time they made it to the semi-finals was in 1990 when they came fourth, thanks to some genius skills from Gascoigne, Platte and Lineker.

This time, their strongest link is the coach, Fabio Capello. England has transformed into a big giant since his arrival, a giant only against mediocre teams. Even under Capello they lost to Spain and Brasil and drew with the Netherlands. Unless Gerrard and Lampard play their best and avoid getting injured, and Rooney scores in every single game, it will be difficult for England to achieve something, especially when they're playing in South Africa.

At any rate, I'm hoping from some solid performances from them. If it wasn't for their victory in 1966 their record in the World Cup would have been shameful. Well, it still is.

Clip For Memory

This is from recent memory. Michael Owen , 18 years old then, scored a wonderful goal against Argentina in 1998. Argentina won in penalties after a 2-2 draw.

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Picture above: Lucy Griffiths, a British actress, who I suppose will be cheering for England. Just saying.

Top 50 Goals in World Cup History

There are a lot of clips on youtube on the best goals ever scored in the World Cup. I think this list is the best one, maybe you won't agree with the ranking, I don't think you can find 2 people who can agree on one list, but I think it really contains the best 50 goals ever scored. Besides, they are fast and mention the player's name and the game.

In my opinion: the best free kick ever was that of Cubillas in 1978.

Best solo effort: Diego Maradona.

Best team work: the last goal on the list of Brasil plus Cambiasso's against Serbia in 2006.

Best shot from outside the box : Socrates against USSR.

Fastest son-of-a-bitch : Maradona and Stoichkov

Enjoy the magic!!

Waving Flag

It's time for Argentina......

Spain: Not This Time, Either

Spain currently has one of the strongest teams in the world. They're ranked # 2 in the FIFA rankings behind Brasil. Given their magnificent performance in Euro 2008 that they won, many people predict a wonderful performance in this World Cup. With players like Casillas, Puyol, Pique, Xavi, Torres, Alonso and Villa they can defeat virtually any team and score a large number of goals.

But here, on this forum, I predict a miserable world cup for the Spaniards. Not only will they fail to advance past the second round (if they actually make it past the first one), but they will fail to connect, fail to defend, and fail to score. They will concede quite a few goals and they will be defeated, badly, by less talented teams.

The hardest prediction in the World Cup is not to predict who's gonna win, but who's gonna lose. Predicting the surprise, and this is the surprise I'm predicting: Spain OUT. Barrrrrraaaaa....

Clip For Memory

In their first game in 1994, Spain were leading South Korea 2-0. The Korean came back and scored 2 goals in the final 5 minutes to equalize it 2-2. That kind of sums up the Spanish experience in World Cup history.

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Picture Above: Casillas, the magical keeper.

Algeria... الجزائر: Dream On

Algeria fought its way, literally, to this World Cup after a major challenge with the Egyptians. Tension rose between both countries to a shamefully disgusting level, and I was happy to see one team emerge as a winner before a military conflict arose between the 2 countries.

Algeria played twice in the World Cup, 1982 and 1986. In 1982 they became one of very few teams in world cup history to win 2 games in one round and not make it to the second round, thanks to a conspiracy between Germany and Austria. In 1986 they didn't play nearly as well except with their 0-1 loss to Brasil.

As an Arab I am glad to see Algeria qualify. Very happy indeed, and I wish for them more than any other Arab team to have a good tournament. We saw a terrible decline in the performance of the Algerian team in the past 20 years, and these qualification were the first ones in ages where Algeria actually had any chance of making it to the finals. They still remain the weakest African team in this tournament, but that doesn't matter, because Morocco in 1986, Cameron in 1990, Nigeria in 1994, Senegal in 2002 did not care either, neither did the 1982 Algeria of Rabah Madjer and Akhdar Balloumi.

Let's wish them the best.

On June 13th they'll play Slovenia

June 18th vs. England

June 23rd vs. United States

Clip For Memory

This is Algeria kicking some arrogant German ass. What's very beautiful about this is the 67th minute. It was 1-0 for Algeria and Germany just scored the equalizer. They barely celebrated the goal, because you know, we are Germany, Europe's champs, playing against those amateurs form Algeria, and now we're ready to load them with goals. But in 30 seconds the Algerians got back to the game and Balloumi netted the ball very comfortably into the net, giving Algeria a well-deserved 2-1 victory.

We want to see more of that.

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The Picture Above: Rabeh Madger, the King of Algerian Football (and a bad commentator too!)

Waka Waka... This Time for Africa

Shakira...... plus

Football....plus

Messi......plus

Maradona....plus

Dancing, Music, Drums

= Perfect

South Africa ... We're Hosting It, So We Get to Qualify

The host team always makes it past the first round, and this world cup will not be an exception. South Africa will make it to the second round, not necessarily because they deserve it, but because they are the host nation. They're not a bad team, and this team actually could be the best they ever had. This week they defeated Colombia 2-1 and Denmark 1-0.

Their group is the strongest, in my opinion. Besides them, they have a maturing Mexican team, a talented Uruguayan team, and France who still got some players who can kick the ball. Ideally they would have no chance of getting a single point, but this time they will get through.

Their coach: Carlos Alberto Parreira. He won the World Cup for Brasil in 1994.

Clip For Memory

Despite qualifying to the World Cup 3 times, S.Africa won only one game against Slovenia 1-0 with a goal from Nomvete. Here it is. Warning: ordinary goal.

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In the picture above: Mark Fish, one of the best players to ever play for South Africa. The whitest, too!

Germany.... Wake Me Up When the World Cup Comes

Germany is a team that doesn't bother to play football unless it matters. It's the exact opposite of other teams like Spain and the Netherlands that have great talents but very few championships.

Germany stays dormant, gets its ass handed to it in friendlies, qualifications and even occasional matches in the World Cup, but some way, somehow, manages to go very far in World Cups.

Even their first World Cup final win against Hungary in 1954 was a huge shocker, as they have lost 3-8 in the first round. They produced great talents in the 1970s, cheated their way into the final in 1982, but in 1990 they had a magical team and won the final games with a gift from the Mexican referee.

Since 1990, they haven't produced a single world-class player. Even Miroslav Klose, the World Cup top goals scorer in 2006, was almost never placed among the best strikers in the world. Almost their entire current squad plays in Germany. German goalkeepers had the reputation of being the best in the world, but the most experienced in this selection played only five international matches.

It's well-known that you can never underestimate the Germans: they can punish you really hard. Even with this team, Germany can still make it to the semi-finals, and with players like Lahm, Mario Gomez and Muller they can even win the Cup. I hope not.

Clip For Memory

Since we are tired of seeing goals, let's remember this famous encounter between Voller and Rijkaard in 1990. Voller had a little argument with Rijkaard and got a red card, and on his way out Rijkaard spat on him, for which Rijkaard was sent off immediately. Later on the players agreed to appear together in a Lurpak commercial. Then they became head coaches of their national teams.

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In the Picture Above: Thomas Muller, the striker, for every Germany selection must have a player named Muller.

The 1967 Syndrome

I am interrupting my mind-blowing preview of the World Cup to remember 1967. Funny how just by mentioning 1967, a year that witnessed many world events, the only thing that comes to any Arab's mind is news of the terrible loss in the six-day war. That sense of defeat keeps running down our spines every time. Many children born that year were named Nakseh and Nakbeh and Hazeemeh and Hazayem and whatever depressing name you can think of.

The fact is, we're still living this defeat to this very day. Every day feels like 1967. Sometimes we hear criticism of Arabs and Palestinians for watching too much sports, songs, trying to have a little fun, talking about things not related to war. The fact is, all what we're doing is trying to see how does it feel to live in 2010. Our reality as a nation has become 1967 while what's happening in the world is our escape from that reality.

Every event in Jordan, every speech in Jordan, every decision in Jordan, every political discussion in Jordan whether it takes a place in the Parliament, a political salon, a cafe or a taxi cab has to do with 1967.

Palestinians have not gained anything since 1967, but lost their national unity. Without a solid Arab support for the Palestinians' rights there is no way to see their life getting better or having any land come back to them. In this time when we see other countries like Turkey, Iran, Brasil, Venezuela, Belgium, Indonesia and who know who caring about Palestinians way more than Arabs are, there's very little hope we will ever live after 1967. We are engulfed with it and this 1967-syndrome is now 43 years old. Chronic, aggressive and more difficult to treat.

New Zealand: The Testicles of the World

These islands that look like a couple of nuts situated at the base of the earth (depending on which map you're looking at) barely have any football history to brag about. For so long it has been so easy for them to make it to the World Cup and all what they had to do is overcome Australia plus the the 5th best South American or 4th Caribbean or 5th Asian or whatever mediocre team they were about to face to make it to the World Cup.

They only made in 1982 and lost their 3 games. This time they qualified just because they defeated New Caledonia, Fiji, Vanutau and Bahrain, making them the least deserved team to qualify to the World Cup.

Two of their current players (Elliott, Mulligan) were kicked out of their clubs and are currently unattached. In other words, they are too bad to play with any club but they were good enough to play with New Zealand National team that will be playing in the World Cup along Italy, Paraguay and Slovakia.

But watch out, those team that have nothing to lose can surprise you, mostly because they have nothing to lose. Otherwise New Zealanders will have to keep watching rugby.

Clip For Memory

Zico scoring a spectacular goal against New Zealand in the 1982 World Cup. Brasil won 4-0.

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The Picture above: I really couldn't think of anything related to New Zealand other than their great beef.

Slovakia.... the Black Sheep

Czechoslovakia was a powerful team, making it to the final match of the World Cup twice. In 1993 it split into the Czech Republic and Slovakia. The best players were the Czech, and in fact they continued to produce a very solid team with world-class players.

In 2010 the Czech came in the same group with Slovakia, and the Slovaks decided to start changing history. They dominated their group and topped it off, with their neighbors coming in third and getting relegated. Slovenia came in second.

Among the Slovaks, the only player who I always watch is Marek Hamsik. He's only 22 but for the past 3 years has managed to bring Napoli back to the top tier level in Serie A along with very few other players. He scores on average once every 3 games with the team even though he's a central midfielder.

Clip For Memory

the final match of the World Cup in Chile 1962 between Brasil and Czechoslovakia , Brasil won 3-1

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The Picture above: One of Marek Hamsek's many tattoos , carefully situated under his left boob.

Greece.... An Incidental Finding

Also known as the least deserved team to win a championship since they won the Euro 2004, Greece is hoping for a lot of luck and prayers just to make it to the second round. Given that they barely qualified in a group that had Switzerland, Latvia, Moldova, Israel and Luxembourg, don't expect them to come in second in a group that has Korea, Nigeria and Argentina.

The man who can lead them ahead is Otto Rehhgal, the same coach who won them the Euro 2004. It looks like the Greek wanna keep this coach even if he gets Alzheimer's disease. Other players they need to count on are Gekas, an occasionally formidable striker.

But the one person who has to excel in South Africa for Greece to have a chance is always the goalkeeper, Kostas Chalkias. One thing for sure: he will be seriously tested.

Clip For Memory

In the Playoffs for the 2010 qualification, Greece faced Ukraine. They drew 0-0 in Greece but Salpiggidis scored this winner for Greece in the Donetsk game, they won 1-0. the clip also gives you a chance to listen to Zorba.

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The Picture Above: A clip from the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"

Switzerland: I didn't know they qualified

Switzerland is one of those countries that can be easily forgotten even when they play well. Their results in the 2006 were pretty decent, where they didn't concede any goal but everybody forgot them. They qualified to this World Cup because they came in the easiest group in the qualification. They had to only overpass Greece, Latvia and Israel. They even lost at home to Luxembourg.

Again, they come in one of the easiest group in the Cup. There is Spain who is the strongest in the group, but there's also Honduras and Chile, who are defeatable. It still remains a big challenge to this Swiss team to get to the second round, but we'll be watching Yakin and Frie led by coach Ottmar Hitzfeld.

Clip to Remember

In the quarter-finals of the 1954 World Cup that they hosted, the lost to Austria 7-5, which is the most number of goals scored in one game in any world cup. First half: Austria 5-4!

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In the picture above: Xenia Tchoumitcheva, who came second in Miss Switzerland 2008.

Serbia.... Europe's Bitch

Serbia was a complete disaster in the last cup. Not only did they lose their 3 games, but they lost to Argentina 0-6. Even when they were prevented from playing in Euro 1992, that gave a chance for a very beautiful Danish surprise to emerge. It seems like nobody wants to see Serbia play anywhere anymore.

They have added some youngsters to their team, and they kept very few experienced ones like Stankovic, who can be a real monster in the midfield and can turn around any game. Two other players to count on: Vidic in defence and Mrda in the front.

That Mrda guy has very little international experience, but he doesn't have a problem scoring a shit load of goals in any game. He hasn't played against big teams yet, and I don't know if their coach whose name I don't know will even let him play, but if he does he can score a few goals.

Serbia has definitely failed to carry on the respectable legacy of a very good Yugoslavia football team, but they can change that. Not this cup though. They'll be playing Germany, Ghana and Australia.

Clip For Memory

The most memorable World Cup moment for them was their loss to Argentina 6-0. This is the second goal for Argentina, coming after 22 excellent passes. Two years earlier, Serbia also lost to Argentina 6-0 in the Olympic Games.

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In the picture above: Bojan Krkic, who realized it might be better for his career to represent Spain rather than his native country Serbia.

Nigeria.... Africa's Heart

In my opinion, Nigeria produced the best African team to ever compete in a world cup, and that was the 1994 Yekini-Okocha-you name it team. They were very close to routing Italy out and perhaps make it to the final if it wasn't for the brilliance of Roberto Baggio.

Nigeria's competitiveness took a little hit in the past decade. Except for the brilliant Tawio of Marseille and Mikel Obi who plays for Chelsea, their current players do not play for any major European club. This comes mostly as other African nations have produced their own Yekinis and Amunekes in the past decade, playing for elite European teams.

This Nigeria is different from the 1994 Nigeria. They have changed their coaches nine times in the past 9 years, and they miraculously qualified to this world cup instead of Tunisia. However, they can always start a new era of magic, and we will be watching.

By the way:

1994 group D: Argentina, Nigeria, Greece, Bulgaria

2010 group B: Argentina, Nigeria, Greece, S.Korea

Conclusion: Korea will make it to the semi-finals.

Clip For Memory

In 1998, Nigeria was trailing 2-1 down to Spain. Lawal equalized then Sunday Olisseh scored this marvelous shot, shot recorded at a speed of 120 kph. Nigeria won 3-2.



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In the picture above: Rashidi Yekini literally tearing apart the Bulgarian net after he literally tore it apart in Nigeria's 3-0 victory in 1994.

Australia: Down UnderEstimated

Along with China, India, Russia and the US, Australia has been another proof that very large countries can easily suck at football. However the Australians made a good decision 60 years too late by leaving the pseudo-continent they're located in and joining the Asian Football Federation.

That made qualification to the WC much easier. They made it to the second round in 2006.

They seem to get better with the years, and we might start seeing them in every world cup. Their chances are not great this time, but I want you to very closely watch their first game against Germany. OK? Against Germany, June 13th, 6.30 pm GMT.

You're welcome.

Clip for Memory:

Australia's 31-0 victory over American Samoa in the 2002 World Cup qualification

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In the Picture above: I don't know any Australian football player and I don't think you do. So I have the privilege of downloading the picture of Ms. Naomi Watts, an aspiring Australian actress.

Uruguay: Glorious Bastards

If you're from Uruguay, you're guaranteed to shed a few tears at the end of each World Cup for how poor has Uruguay's performance become in the more recent World Cups.

Uruguay was the first country to host and win the World Cup. It won again in 1950. The reason I respect this country is that they caused the biggest humiliation in the history of football, in the history of the country of Brasil, when they completely destroyed them in the final game of the 1950 World Cup.

Uruguay won that game, and took the cup away from the Brazilians , resulting in a national tragedy in Brasil and a whole lot of respect among Brazilian-haters like myself.

To know how powerful Uruguay was, they have not conceded their first defeat ever in the World Cup until 1954. Since they made it to the semi-final in 1970 they have been struggling to just make it to the finals. They struggled this time, and they won't go too far in this cup, although Forlan can score from just anywhere in the field.

Clip For Memory:

Naturally, their destruction of Brasil in Rio in front of 200,000 people in 1950. Barboasa , the Brasilian goalie said in 2000, "In Brasil the maximum sentence is 30 years, but I have suffered for 50".

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(In the picture above, Diego Forlan the Uruguayan striker. I think he has some great resemblance to the the tennis player Martina Navratiolva)

Hareega: For Every Football Horny

As my fan base of 10 people have noticed, I haven't been blogging lately. I got busy at work. However with the world cup coming, and with me living in South Dakota where the only sport is shooting bears and milking cows, I need to talk football.

With the World Cup coming in just ten days (I can't believe it!), I will be talking football here, real football with football-horny people who appreciate football.

I'll randomly discuss different teams from different groups before the kick-off on June 11th. Feel free to give me your comments and completely offend players, countries, ethnicities and cultural backgrounds. We need your valuable input based on mere fanaticism in order to make this world a better place.

(In the picture above: Christiano Ronaldo)