Of mice and rabbits and dogs and men

We've had a few problems with animal right activists. They frequently broke into our labs and "freed" mice and rabbits that we've been experimenting on.

We changed the lab doors into well-locked ones and no more animals were freed anymore.

We are currently in the process of developing a new drug for valley fever (coccidiodmycosis) which is an infection very common in Southwest USA. This time we got some sponsorship from animal lovers because valley fever affects dogs as well as humans!

I'm not sure they know that, but lots and lots of rabbits and mice will be sacrificed (killed) during this research.
They probably consider dogs more important than mice and rabbits.
I consider humans more important than all of these animals!

The departed

He believed in peace but did not see it coming so he stepped aside.

It's sad to see how patriotic and intelligent Palestenians were put aside and gang members are reigning with their guns.

It appeared to me as if Haydar Abdil Shafi died a decade ago and not just yesterday.

Dear our Censorship Hero Mr. Nabil Al-Momani

Thank you for visiting my blog today. You've promised to be a permanent reader and I hope you'll keep your promise.

I'm really surprised about the announcement that you will start watching blogs and everything they contain. I thought you've always done that, but as they say "late better than never."

We need you here. Our Jordanian blogsphere is polluted with cracked, uneducated, totally rude, unpatriotic, anti-freedom ignorant Jordan haters.

I need you here. I need you to teach me to love my country, to watch my words before I regurgitate them in public and hurt my people, and most important of all, I need you to teach me freedom.

I wish you a great day navigating our blogs. I hope to meet you soon and who knows, I'm going to have lunch now so maybe I'll find you in my food and water and then we can have a long chat.

Sincerly yours,
Ignorant Hareega

(And dude, if you're still at work can you please ask someone to arrange all my articles into categories, I never knew how to do that, would really appreciate it)

هل يتحمل الأردن وجود شعبين على أرضه؟

يبدو أن الاردن بدأ تدريجياً ينقسم إلى جزئين، ويبدو أن الشعب الواحد بدأ يتحول إلى شعبين

.
كل شعب له أرضه وأهدافه و طموحاته وحتى لغته الخاصة

أنا لا أتحدث عن الأردني والفلسطيني
ولا أتحدث عن الاردنيين والعراقيين

أنا أتحدث عن شعب نسبته في الأردن قليلة لكنه يملكه كله بشوارعه وأنفاقه وأراضيه وبناياته وقريباً جدا سيملك أبنائه وبناته

وشعب آخر كان في يوم من الأيام سعيداً بحياته المتواضعة فخوراً بانتمائه لوطنه وراضياً بما كتب عليه الزمن لكنه بدأ يفيق على نفسه ووجد أن القليل جداً من أبناء وطنهم قد طاروا إلى المقدمة وتركوهم يلهثون في الخلف

ورغم أن الهوة بين الغني والفقير يدأت بالاتساع والطبقة المتوسطة بدأت تنصهر بتسارع رهيب إلا أن هذا لا يمثل المشكلة الرئيسة المشكلة أن الغني بدأ ينسى أو يتناسى أن الفقير إنسان حي بدأ ينسى أنه أردني مثله وأن عليه حقاً عليه كمواطن بدعمه

أيام زمان كان من الصعب أن تعرف الغني من الفقير فكلاهما يلبس نفس الملابس وكلاهما يتحدث نفس اللغة وكلاهما يأكل من طبق واحد وحتى إذا ما عُرف الغني فنادراً ما كنت ترى حاقداً أو حاسداً لأن الغني كان يستحق نقوده

المشكلة في الأردن ليست وجود الغني والفقير بل المشكلة أن الاردني الغني نسي أن هناك أردني فقير

نسي أن معظم الأردنيين يعيشون خارج عمان وفقد كل أحساس بالمسؤولية تجاههم هناك منازل في الاردن لا تصلها المياه والكهرباء إلا بواسطة وهناك مدارس لا يوجد فيها معلمي توجيهي وهناك آلاف من الطلاب لا يملكون ما يكفيهم شراء حقيبة جديدة أو كتاب أو حتى قلم

مش عم بتخوت

هناك طلاب في الاردن لا يملكون ما يكفي شراء قلم

هناك طلاب في الجامعة يتحسبون من رفع أجرة السرفيس أو الباص قرشاً واحد

هناك الكثير من المبدعين الذين رغم كل تلك الظروف تفوقوا على أنفسهم وأبدعوا في التوجيهي لكنهم عادوا إلى حلب الأبقار لأنهم لا يملكون ما يكفي سد أقساط فصل واحد من الجامعة في ظل غياب شيه تام عن رعاية الطلاب المتفوقين

الأردني الغني أصبح له عالمه وأرقامه وأناسه وأصبحت كل رحلة له خارج دولته الزمردية مغامرة محفوفة بالمخاطر يلاقى فيها شعباً أردنياً مختلفاً عنه متخلفاً فوضوياً بتعريفه مُجرد من الحضارة العمانية الصارخة التي يتفاخر بها أصدقائه النرجسيين

الفقيرليس أعمى فهو براقب كل هذا بحسرة لكن حسرته تتحول إلى غضب والأردني الفقير غضب كثيراً في الماضي ومن كنا نعتبرهم أكثر الناس إخلاصاً للوطن ثاروا قبل ذلك لأن التاريخ علمنا أن حتى أكثر الناس وطنية غالبا ما يفضلون مصلحتهم الشخصية على مصلحة الوطن رغم الشعارات الرنانة بعكس ذلك

الكثير من الامبراطوريات العملاقة خنعت عل ركبيتها والكثير من الحضارات العظيمة والدول الجبارة انهارت واختفت من على الخارطة والأردن دولة صغيرة بسيطة لا يتحمل وجود شعبين يتلك المشاعر المتعادية وأتمنى أن نتعلم ونتصرف قبل أن نندم

Of dogs and men

Michael Vick....

This football player was arrested and charged in arranging fights between dogs, where the loser dog in the fight is killed in front of cheering people.

News channels never stopped talking about him and describing how horrible this behavior was.

He apologized and asked for forgiveness, and discouraged everybody from doing the same. He will probably serve some time in jail.

I just remembered something I posted more than a year ago,
"It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets."

It's sad to realize that humans sometimes worth less than bitches.

Thank you for not killing me

Accompanied by my brother and father, I was flying from Tucson to Vegas.
Airlines: Southwest.

We took off from Tucson for this one-hour flight. About 15 minutes into the flight, we heard a weird noise, probably coming from under the plane.

A few moments later the pilot made an announcements, "Folks I think we have a technical problem in the landing gear, we have to return and go back to Tucson."

Then he added, "but don't worry, everything is OK."

I was wondering if the landing gear is not functioning, why are we returning to Tucson rather than continuing to Vegas. It would not matter if we crash in Tucson or Vegas.

It didn't feel great as the plane was taking more curves and returning to Tucson. I was thinking how many passengers in the hijacked 9/11 planes did not know they were being hijacked in the beginning. "What if the one talking to us was not the pilot but some crazy hijacker?", I thought.

I also remembered the jetblue flight last year that almost went into flames because of its landing gear malfunction. Ironically the jetblue passengers were watching their own landing live on the TV screens inside the plane!
Here's a video of the jetblue incident on live TV:



The plane landed peacefully in the end. I got a letter from Southwest 2 weeks later, "....shortly after takeoff, the Pilots received an indication that the landing gear wouldn't retract. As such, the Captain made the decision to return to TUS (Tucson) to have the problem inspected. Our Maintenance Department reports that the mechanism that helps lift the gear and holds it in place wasn't working properly."

They also sent each of us a 100-dollar voucher!

I did some Internet search that showed that Southwest had a terrible landing gear problem just TWO MONTHS before my flight and they hand to land emergently in Oakland. Now I'm not so happy!
I guess that when you pay 49 dollars for a flight, that's what you will get.

Rules of Hesitation

Last week, my Jordanian friend here in town called to invite me to iftaar.

I was glad to be invited, but I was wondering how many times should I refuse before finally accepting to come.

"Hey Faris come to iftaar Friday"

"Thanks for the invitation but no thanks"

"No you have to come......"

"But then your wife has to cook.... ma beddi aghallebha"

"No please come we're cooking anyway"

"No thanks I'll be OK"

"No please come "

"No thanks"

"please come"

"No thanks"

"please come"

"No thanks"

"Please please please"

"Ok I will, what time?"

"6.30"

"OK thanks man, you know there's no need for that"

"No you have to come"

"No I'm OK ma fee da3i"

"No you have to come"

"No balash balash"

"No please please"

"No thanks"

"no please please please"

After a serious thought that he might think I don't want to come, I finally accepted and had a great mansaf.
-------------------------------------------------------


Americans on the other hand take yes as a yes, and no as a no.


On my first Christmas eve alone in the US, I was on-call at night in the hospital with my senior resident.

My senior resident then asked me, "What are you doing tomorrow (Christmas)?"

"Nothing"

"Ok my sister is making a dinner for the family. You can join us if you want"

I thought it would be nice for me to go, but of course, subconsciously, I answered, "No thanks"

He seemed a little bit dissatisfied with my answer, but didn't say anything.


Next moring he told me again, "you know I won't feel offended if you don't come".

Now I was between a rock and a hard place. I don't want to make him upset but at the same time he's not insisting, he's not pulling his hair and didn't point finger on my nose, didn't threaten to never speak to me again or never talk to anyone in my family for the rest of his life. Where's the swearing? Where's the fighting and grabbing? Where are all these oaths to divorce his wife if I didn't show up?

I said accepted. I sometimes find it hard to tell this story because I didn't want to be looked at as that dirsty cheap man without honor who accepted an invitation only from the second time.

God please forgive me.

Heart and Mind

Just got back form a lecture about dyslipidemia (high cholesterol) and heart disease.

The talk was great, the speaker is an international expert on this topic. Other doctors and I were invited by a drug company to attend the lecture that took in place in a restaurant in town.

We were served bread with some very good butter, steaks with mashed potatoes and gravey, and had a great dessert with ice-cream and cheesecake.

Feeling of guilt? A little bit. I should have eaten ALL of the ice-cream, it was so good.

Maybe our next lecture about lung disease will be sponsored by Marlboro

Worse than shit

A week ago, I started sensing a bad smell, a smell worse than shit, coming from my kitchen. I cleaned it, but the smell worse than shit persisted. I cleaned the 3 dishes and 2 glasses I have very well, the smell worse than shit was still there!

I cleaned my fridge and threw everything out, and the smell worse than shit was getting worse.
I cleaned the kitchen closets, the kitchen floor, the kitchen drawers, but the smell worse than shit never went away.

I started having doubts that my neighbors above were killed and that the smell worse than shit was their bodies', but seeing them smoking something suspicious on the balcony proved to me otherwise.

I started thinking it might have been the lizard we killed last week because I didn't throw all of her body out, but I remember the remainder of the body was left in the sitting room and the smell worse than shit was coming only from the kitchen.

Finally I thought to myself I gotta buy a new soap with a powerful scent and clean the whole kitchen the get rid of this smell that is worse than shit.

I threw my old soap in the trash outside. A day later the smell worse than shit started coming from the trash. I picked up the soap and smelled it. It smelled worse than shit.
Morale of the story: never clean your kitchen.

9/12

Just like all calenders skip February 30th , I was hoping it would start skipping 9/11.

On that day things larger than planes were hijacked and values more precious than the Twin Towers collapsed.

Under no circumstance was that attack justified and under no circumstance it should be justified in the future.

I stole this tribute for the victims from youtube:

Add this number

202-456-1111

Call this number in the US NOW!

Express yourself, speak up. Don't be silent. Your voice might be heard, can't guarantee that though, but you should try.

You won't lose anything, you won't be punished in any way just for the call. You should be free to speak up. SPEAK UP for God's sake. Nobody will know how you feel unless you talk.

I already called. It's your turn. Whether you're in the US or Jordan or anywhere in the world, you should call this number above.

مخلفهم و ناسيهم

قبل أكمن يوم جبت سيرة البنت الحديثة الولادة اللي لقوها بالحاوية بعد ما أهلها زتوها

اليوم جريدة الرأي ذكرت اكتشاف طفلين لقيطين

واحد منهم عند الجامعة الأردنية والثاني دخلت أمه فيه على أحد الجوامع وتركته بعدين هربت

رد فعلي الأول إنه هؤلاء الآباء والامهات ما عندهم انسانية ولا ضمير

لأنه الجرائم مثل هيك ما كانت تصير أبدا بالاردن ولا حتى أيام الطفر

لكن هناك احتمال ولو صغير إنه الأم اللي تركت ابنها بالجامع كانت إنسانة طبيعية

لم تكن إنسانة خالية من العواطف والحنان بل كانت تفكر بابنا وما زات تفكر به وربما ن تسامح نفسها على ما فعلت
وربما حن عليها قلبها ترمي ولدها بالحاوية قالت برميه بالجامع بلكي لقطه ابن حلال دار باله عالولد

حتى الأم -وممكن يكون الاب- اللي رموا بنتهم بالحاوية قالوا يمكن الحاوية أحسنلها من العيشة اللي راح تعيشها

كثير شغلات عم تصير بالاردن بتخلي الانسان يحس إنه قيمته كإنسان عم تتدهور و سعره عم يرخص مع إنه كل إشي

حواليه عم يغلي

Bin Ladin in Australia

As Bush was visiting Australia (not Austria as Bush misspelled it yesterday), an Australian comedian dressed like Bin Ladin and sneaked to where Bush was staying. Security saw the man and jumped on him and got him arrested.

Bill Maher was joking about it, "they immediately knew he wasn't Bin Ladin, because they were able to catch him"

And this is how we say "Welcome to Tucson"

The Mrs. America contest was held yesterday here in Tucson, Arizona.

A few days before that, one of the contestants, Mrs. Tennessee, was walking outside her hotel when she saw a big spider coming her way.

Scared to death, she moved out of his way but a snake nearby jumped on her foot and bit her.

Mrs. Tennessee was rushed to the hospital where she spent the night in the ICU.

Three days later she was discharged from the hospital and was able to compete, and guess what? She came second after Mrs. Wyoming.

Here's her photo after she left the hospital.

Oh Pavarotti

I was never an opera fan, but was really hoping that one day I can go to one of his concerts.

Looks like that will never happen!

R.I.P.

From the trash, back to the trash.....

The baby the moment she was found

If you live in Jabal Amman, watch it before you throw your trash in any of their trash boxes. Yesterday they found a newborn in one of their trash boxes.

The baby was seconds away from being smashed and killed if it wasn't for the man who picked her up.

It's very possible that other newborns were thrown away and killed by their parents.

Was the baby lucky she was saved? Maybe not! When she grows up she'll probably go back to the trash to pick up empty soda bottles to sell them for piasters...
You decide.......

A Jordanian Battle in Vegas

Location: The Treasure Island hotel in Las Vegas.

Time: Last week

People:

1- Hareega with brother and father

2- Cousin (of my father's age) and his wife.

Cousin, "What do you wanna do now?"

As usual, I suggest eating.

Hareega: "Wanna eat in their buffet?"

Cousin, "Yes, I'll wait for my wife to come back from the restroom"

Hareega, "Ok I'll go get the tickets for tonight's show then I'll see you at the buffet, join us when your wife comes back"

I got the tickets then headed toward the buffet. You have to pay first, so I stepped forward to one of the cashiers and handled her my credit card.

"Five people please"

As she took my credit card, I saw my cousin from a distance. Our eyes met. He saw me handling the credit card to the cashier lady and he knew it: he realized I was about to pay for him and his wife.

In the blinking of an eye, he started running to the cashier. My 60-year old cousin was running faster than Sa3eed Owaitah. He pushed aside a couple of people waiting on the line and threw his credit card on the lady's desk.

He looked at me straight in the face, "Shame on you, shame on you", he screamed.

I screamed back, "No way you're gonna pay, no way", then I looked back at the cashier lady and lowered my voice but spoke seriously, "I gave you my card first, you gotta use my card, OK?"

The little lady took my card and was about to process it, but my cousin's voice escalated, "No, take my card ...."

The little Asian lady sitting was confused. "I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do!"

I told her, "Just take my card"...

My cousin looked back, "I swear by the life of Badee3a that I'll pay"

Badee3a is a close relative but I'm not sure what exactly is her relationship to me. There's also more than one Badee3a in the family, all of them are born before 1920. They are frequently sworn by the Masannats. To be the person sworn by is a great privilege in any Jordanian family.

I was confused now, thinking to myself, "I still have to pay, but he's just sworn by Badee3a"

I still had to show resistance.

"I'll pay this time, you pay next time"

My cousin was furious, "No, I swear by the souls of Fatha (his late mother) and Metri (my late grandfather) that I will pay. Put your card back in your pocket. Khallisni"

I realized that I just lost the battle. Nobody dares to resist swearing by the lives and souls of Badee3a, Fatha and Metri. Without uttering a word, I placed my card back in my wallet.

I was really surprised security did now show up to the scene.

Observing the sorrow in my eyes, once nice couple offered to help, with the man saying, "Hey man it's OK you can pay for us if you want".

I didn't answer and stepped forward towards the restaurant, drowned with my defeat and silenced by my shame. Although that had saved me more than a 100 dollars, it left my dignity with an open wound that time will not heal. The delicious food could not overcome the bitter taste of defeat. Since that day I started reconsidering my tactics for next battle.

# 40

I started listening to Classicals recently, I loved Mozart's symphony 40,
here's one version of it


and here's another version , with glass!



Great music, but I can't forgive that moron Mozart for stealing it all from Fairuz.