Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Match summary

Date: Last Saturday
Place: Alfonso's house.
Occasion: The football match between Paraguay and Peru.
People watching the game in the house: Nine Paraguayans and one Jordanian.
Temper before the game : Everyone is angry, very angry.
Reason for being angry: unknown.
Youngest person in the house: Alfnonso, 25 years old.
Oldest: His grandmother, sixty-something
Every other word used during the game: puta
Player cursed the most: Cabañas from Paraguay for missing three golden chances
Person who cussed the most: the grandmother
Person cussed the most: Hareega for being a known Argentinian fan.
Referee of the game: some Brazilian, also referred to as a "un puto grande brasilieno" 23 times
Cuss words learned during the game: none, only puta was used.
End result: 0-0
but felt like: Paraguay lost 10-0
People blamed for not winning: Paraguay's 11 players, the coach, the assistant coach, the president of Paraguay, the ex-president of Paraguay and Hareega for bringing in the evil spirit of Argentina to the house.
Number of times Hareega mentioned he's not Argentinian just a supporter of the team: 9
Number of people who believed him: zero
Paraguay's next match: tomorrow
Paraguayans who want to see Hareega during the game: zero
Paraguayans who want to see Hareega ever: zero
The population of Paraguay: six million
The population of Jordan: six million
Most popular sport in Paraguay: football
Most popular sport in Jordan: football
Average IQ (according to Richard Lynn) of Paraguayans: 85
Average IQ of Jordanians: 87
Average IQ of Paraguayans during a football game: zero
Average IQ of Jordanians during a football game: zero.

50 comments:

secratea said...

looooooooooooooooooool@ hareega..
you are hilarious! I love reading your posts when I am suffering from the nakad syndrome..you make me laugh BIG TIMES :D

Qwaider قويدر said...

HAHAHAHAHA ... that was so funny!
I guess we're smarter than Paraguayans, but what they lack in brains they substitute in the real football play!

Luai said...

Use the word "cabrone" and see the looks you get....they might be impressed you know some Spanish! It's one of my all time favorites!

Firas said...

Wow, my IQ has just increased, man this post did it all, I've learned a new language, new facts about other countries.

Why they call it El Gatu? It's like they are GUlfians or something!

Rambling Hal said...

I almost peed myself laughing I swear to God.

Too much information? Yes I know. Bas this was also too too funny. :)

Adoosh said...

LOOOOL @ the summary.. It cracked me up.. Allah ysahhel 3al zameel 3othman!

psst: shu ya3ny "puta"?! O_o

batir said...

Fantastic post Hareega. One of your all time greats.
The matches started as usual. Argentina turning on the style and Brazil running away with an undeserved point. When they meet together, the gates of hell will open on Argentina and Brazil wins. I started to hate this.

Maher said...

please tell me you didnt miss Riquelme Vs Chile!!

how about that !!

Hareega said...

secratea... thanks a lot!

Qwaider... we're 2 points smarter but 100 places below them in the FIFA rankings

luai... i will remember that

Firas... i have no idea man, maybe there's some gulfans there!

hal... a little bit TMI, thanx for reading

adoosh... bedaksh te3raf shu ya3ni outa, but i recommend not saying it at all :D

MAher... of course I didn't, Roman was the man. This player is unbelievable, it's not only his free kicks but the way he sees the game, and his outstanding passes, he's a genius.

Batir... tell me about it! All the time during Chile's game I was still thinking of how we lost 0-3 to those brazilian bastards. I'm so afraid this will happen. IT will onlt take a world cup victory for me to forget about it

ola said...

LOOL hilarious!!

Isam Abu Salhieh said...

man ... i would love to have a national team which can actually have the chance to qualify to the world cup :(

and Suda-amiricanos have the best spirit ever ... not in football in everything ... am gonna go live there for some time ...

peace o a late kol 3am o enta be 5er

Hareega said...

thank you Isam o enta bi khair

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