On Camels and Horseback

Escaping from the genocide in Darfur, victims found shelter in neighboring Chad.
Now Arabs, on camels and horseback, are chasing them to finish them.
Another genocide is on its way, this time committed by us.
Arabs should be the first to stand against these massacres because our names are written all over it.

Shades of Red

Just wanted to share with you how many people and world leaders have celebrated the Valentine ;)

How some people spent their Valentine

On this day fifteen years ago, hundreds of Iraqis were hiding in Baghdad when US air forces struck their shelter in Al-Amiriyah, killing more 500 people.

Reason for attack: intelligence reports suggesting the bunker was a military command site.

Victims: Almost all were women and children.

Weapons found : None.

Twelve years later, another strike on Iraq, again based on intelligence reports that Iraq had WMD and was linked directly to al-Qaeda, or so they said.

It's either that the intelligence is not intelligent, or people are too stupid to believe them.

وردة حمراء…on a Valentine's Day

One of the wonderful short stories by my friend Nakhleh ... It will give you another sense of Valentine
enjoy
Hareega
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السماء حبلى بأمطار وأسرار و أشياء أخرى… سار منتشياً بنكهة هذا اليوم الذي قدمه شباط هديّة للحب و المحبين…

كان دائماً يحب شباط…برده من كانون، و دفؤه من آذار، ونسيمه من نيسان…كأن السنة كلها قد أودعته تناقضاتها و أسرارها الحميمة، فلم يبخل هو، رغم أنه ابنها الأصغر ، بالرابع عشر عيداً مقدّساً لكل متيّم و حبيبة

مشى في الشارع المرتجف ينشد وردة حمراء…وردة واحدة جميلة لا بد أن يحصل عليها… لكن الجو المتجمّد كان ينذر بإغلاق للمتاجر قريب… فأخذ يهم في خطوه يكاد يعدو… و كأنه يجاري تيار المشاة المسرع الذي أخذ يخلي الطريق…

لم يبقَ الا محل الزهور عند الزاوية…اقترب من المكان لكن صوتاً حاداً سمّره في مكانه…التفت فإذا سيارة مسرعة تطرح رجلاً عجوزاً على الإسفلت… فرّ السائق في لمح البصر…فيما استعجلت البقيّة الباقية من المارة طريقها بعيداً عن مسرح الحدث

وقف للحظة يفكّر…لكن الرعد أيقظه فجأة، فيما بدأ المطر يهمي ليسقي المنظر كؤوساً من ماء بارد…نظر الى واجهة المحل ثم عاد و اندفع نحو الرجل الملقىعلى صفحة الأرض…فصدمه منظر النظارة السوداء التي يرتديها والعصا التي يحملها…و بسرعة انتشله من بين فكيّ الشارع الغارق في الدموع الشباطيّة…تفاهما دون كلام…سار العجوز الضرير مستنداً على كتف الشاب القوي و احتميا في محل الزهور فيما اشتد غضب المطر…لم يصب الختيار بأذى…كادت السيارة أن تدهمه لكنّه سقط أرضاً

شدّ على يد الشاب و قال بصوت جميل يناسب البياض في رأسه: " شكراً يا بني."وقف مبتلاً وسط المكان…ثم تذكّر

الوردة الحمراء…اقترب بوجل من البائعة و قال بهدوء مرتجف:-" أريد، لو سمحتِ، وردة حمراء

ابتسمت البائعة وردت بمرح…-" الورد الأحمر في عيد الحب غالٍ…!"، ثم أكملت بابتسامة آسفة :-" لم يبقَ عندنا ورد أحمر

ولا وردة ؟!"…قالها بهمس حزين وهو يجيل النظر بين أصناف الورود فلا يجد مبتغاه…_" آخر وردة بيعت قبل قليل…" … وقف كالمذبوح… كان جسمه يرتعش وأخذ يحس بخدر خفيف يلف رأسه

رفع الشيخ عصاه و هتف بذات الصوت الواضح العميق:_ " أظن يا عزيزتي أنك لو بحثتِ خلف تلك المجموعة هناك فستجدين وردة حمراء…" ...ابتسمت البائعة من مداعبة العجوز و التفتت وهي تكرر أسفها:_" أعتذر حقاً…لقد بعت بنفسي آخر وردة قبل لحظات…" " هناك هناك! خلف الأزهار الجميلة تلك…"عادت يداها تبحث في غير تصديق، حتى إذا استلت من بين الزهور وردة حمراء في غاية الجمال

وقفت مشدوهة لا تصدق ما بين يديها…التفت الشاب و كأنه في حلم…فضحك الأعشى وأشار بعصاه الى صدر الفتى و قال مبتسماً:- " القلب يرى يا صديقي " ...لم يرفع عينيه عن الوردة الساحرة تداعبها يدان مدربتان، تلفانها بغلاف شفاف و ببعض النوار الأبيض…- " لن آخذ منك ثمنها…" ابتسمت البائعة و هي تهز رأسها…"كل عام وأنتما بخير

التفت فلم يجد الرجل العجوز…احتضن وردته الغالية وخرج مسرعاً …لكن الشارع كان خالياً تماماً…وقف للحظة تحت المطر …أخذ يتخيّل الوردة و قد زيّنت صدغ حبيبته و عطرت شعرها الفاحم…وضع عينيها العسليتين أمامه و سار…يده تحمي وردة حمراء دافئة…و المطر الذي يشتد تهنئة ساخرة من شباط…لم تُنسه ذكرى صديق جميل…أخفاه الرعد كما يخفي الشتاء التموّجات المرتجفة التي تطبعها قدماه المسرعتان فوق الشارع المبتل

نخلة الياس أبو ياغي

Mehhhico en America

I went last week to watch the most exciting football game one can watch in America, the US vs. Mexico.
If the US was looking for a place to receive support from the fans in the game, Arizona was the worst choice. There were over sixty thousand Mexican fans , one thousand American fans and three Jordanians.
We were planning to route for America, we had an American flag and of course I brought a Jordanian flag with me, no question about it. For most of the match I was holding it blocking the view of at least three people around me, way to make people love Jordan.

Once inside the stadium we had to chear for Mexico, it was kinda scary not to. When a bunch of guys stand in front of you holding a large Tableh you and the people around you scream with passion , "Tarabattatoo Mehhhhico" you gotta scream with them.

By the way, Mexican waves look nice on TV but it sucks when you're part of them. It makes you lose focus on the game and instead focus on when you have to stand up and raise your hands.

Despite their victory 2-0, I felt sorry for the US team, it really sucks when you play home and all the fans are chearing for the other team. Football has very long way until it becomes popular among Americans. It's naive to think that Beckham can change the popularity of football in America, Hello!! Pele and Beckenbauer played in America and that didn't change a thing!

I like Jay Leno joke, "David Beckham is coming to play in America. That will probably change the way Americans ignore soccer"

Maybe a good start is to call football with its name.

Feels just like yesterday

First Impressions

2005.....
I met Dr. Carpenter

He pretended to be smart, "You have a Turkish name"
(nothing Turkish in my name)

"No it's Arabic, Jordanian, I'm from there"
"wow , it's interesting how you guys there heard about the Univeristy of Arizona, how did you know about us?"
"My father did his PhD here thirty years ago"
-----------------------------------------------

2006
I saw Dr. Carpenter again, re-introduced myself
"Are you from Turkey like Dr. Osman?"
"No, from Jordan."
"Wow, it's interesting how you guys there heard about the University of Arizona, how did you know about us?"
"Actually I know it from my father, he did his PhD here thirty years ago"
-----------------------------------------------

Today..... met Dr. Carpenter again, re-re-introduced myself

Later, he started talking about the good reputation of the University of Arizona
"You know, people from all over the world know about the University of Arizona. I once met a Turkish doctor who came here because his father studied here long time ago"

"Really! Isn't that something?" , I answered while thinking in my mind "May God help his wife"

يلعن أبو هالشغلة

الزمان: قبل اسبوع

المكان: منزل صديق تونسي

المناسبة: عزيمة على العشاء بمناسبة منزل جديد وعملنا حالنا ناسيين شو المناسبة عشان ما نجيب هدية

يجلس حريقة بجانب عادل السوري وسليم الفلسطيني، اضافة الى كوبلز امريكان كانا جالسان يتغزلان ببعضهما البعض وامراة سوداء

يسال حريقة سليما: "مان مين هذول الاميركان القاعدين ما لقطت اسمهم

اجابه سليم باستياء: "نسيت ..ومش فارقة معي همه جايين هون ياكلو ولا يحسوسو على بعض

"طيب مين هاذي السودة سوادها مش اميركاني لا تكون سودانية!"

وهنا دقره عادل قائلا : "لاء يا زلمة هادي من.... من.... " ثم اخفض صوته حتى كاد يختفي "من رواندا يا زلمة كل اهلها دبحوهم واغتصبوهم وجننوهم ما ضل حدن فيهن الا هي اجت لجوء عاميركا يعني رافيوجيي كامب بس لا تجيبلها سيرة بلاش تئلب دراما
ثم اردف قائلا : "اسمع انا بعرف هدولي كلن معن غرين كارد ليش ما تتجوزا ؟ اظن انها كاسوليك

اجابه حريقة: "لاء شكرا خليلك اياه

ليش يعني عشنها عبدة؟

لاء بس بديش اتجوز، ولو بدي ما بدي ولادي خوالهم يكونو اوناديكا و تامبوكاند

وهنا تدخل سليم قائلا :" مان عيب تحكي عنها عبدة هادي بني ادمة"

" حاجي بئا تتفلسف انت كل ما تشوف اسود بتحكي عنو نيغر "

"اه بس عالقليلة مش زي حضرة جنابك كل ما ييجي مكسيكي عندكو يقدم عشغل بتطلع عليه سمعة انه تبع مخدرات "عشان ما يوظفوه

"لاءا حبيبي هادا بس رودريغو الي كان معي بالجامعة هالمازار فاكار بكره العرب كره العمى و عشو مني عارف"

ثم قطع المناقشة دخول ادريس حاملا بعض صحون الطعام
ساله حريقة "شو هاظا؟"

اخذ ادريس نفسا عميقا ثم شمر عن ساعديه واخذ يشير الى المائدة كدليل السياحي "هذه سلطة مشوية ناكلها كثير في تونس وهذيك طاجين قوتة وهذيك بريك بالتن وهذيك اكلة نسميها اللبلالي

?وشو هاظا الاخظر و الاحمر اللي هون" ساله حريقة مشيرا الى طبق جانبي"

"هذي باذنجان بالثوم والفقوس" ثم اكمل قائلا "ان شالله يعجبكم"

هز عادل و حريقة راسيهما موافقين ام سليم فقال بحماس "يا زلمة فتحت نفسنا

دخل ادريس ليحضر بعض المشروبات غير الروحية
واثناء غيابه اعلن سليم ببعض من الخوف "انا مش راح آكل من هاد ابصر شو فيه الاكل

وسانده حريقة "و لا انا يا زلمة الوان الاكل زي قوس قزح " ثم وضع يده على كرشه المترهل و اضاف "انا اصلا معدتي حساسة للاكل بشكل عام

وهنا عاد ادريس الى الغرفة قائلا "اني قلت لاحمد ييجي لكنه قال انه مشغول والله اعتقد انه كاذب، يحاول يتفاداني، لمن صار يشتغل بالسوفت وير صار معاه فلوس بطل يتكلم معايا، فاكرلي نفسه ذكي لكنه مكلخ، شكله مثل البخوش المبجوق .... حاشاكم و حاشا مقامكم"

"
اضاف عادل "اه لاحطت هالشي أنبيليفابل يا زلمة مفكر ازا صار معه قرشين يعني صار بني ادم، لسا هديك السنة بتزكر وانا قاعد عنده مسامير كنبياته دخلت بطيزي

"يا ساتر"

"وقال شو مفكر يفتحلي سوفت وير كومباني هالاهبل"

"راجل مكلخ"

.......تدخل حريقة باقتراح مهم
"خليه يسميها ظراط عالبلاط دوت كوم"

قام ادريس ليحضر المزيد من الاطعمة الملونة ثم قال سليم "يا زلمة ما بدي اكمل هالاكل كتير تقيل عالمعدة
اضاف حريقة معلقا وهو يلحوس ما تبقى من الصحن الثالث وسط نظرات استهجان شديدة من الكوبلز الامريكان "اه مان هذا اكل ما بتتاكل انا عارف كيف عايشين عليه هناك؟"

قال عادل بسخرية " لازم نعطيه للعبدة تبعته لشعبها هناك هع هع هع هع

وانفجر الشباب ظاحكين على هذه النكتة السخيفة وبعدها اندمج الحضور في حديث حول صراع الحضارات والحرب على العراق ومباراة السوبر بول الاحد القادم

و اثناء الحديث ذكرت الرواندية انها تحب تعلم اللغات المختلفة، فاخذ حريقة يتفلسف بصفته يجيد غناء أغنية عيشة بالفرنسية ويستطيع طلب البوريتو بالاسبانة من المطعم المكسيكي المجاور

فسألها بالآنجليزية: كم لغة تتكلمين؟
أجابت الرواندية "فايف، انغليش، فرنش، رواندان، سواهيلي " ثم صمتت لثانتين واضافت "ارابيك"

التفت الجميع اليها وكأنها ألقت لتوها بقنبلة ذرية على المائدة. ثم أضافت و كأنها تجيب على سؤال لم تُسأله "أنا

أتهدس الهربية جيداً فلقدت درست في مدرسة هربية

أكمل الجميع طعامهم بهدوء شديد ّمتفادين النظر الى أي شخص جالس قبل ان يعلق أدريس "اه نسيت اقولك أنه

ألويسيا تتحدث العربية"

أجابه حريقة "أنت راجل مكلخ" ثم أكمل طعامه بهدوء وهو يفكر أذا ما زال بإمكانه الحصول على منسف في مثل هذه الساعة المتأخرة من الليل

Batistuta

Turned 38 today.....

I feel he can play till he's 70, one of the most brilliant and faithful football players of all times.

If you visit the historical city of Firenze, you'll find a statue built especially for him.

By the way, he got married when he was 21, currently has 4 children, his middle name is Omar and youngest son's name is Shamel. It looks like there's something Arabic in him....

Enjoy this fantastic goal agianst Manchester United in England

and if you got 5 minutes this short clip of some of his goals

UPDATE: This is one of the most touching moments in football. Batistuta played for Fiorentina for 8 years then moved to Roma, and in his first game with Roma against his old team he scored the only goal in the final minutes. The player's celebrated but he broke into tears because he scored against his old team.

hayyo el clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yptEUrgqYN0&NR

UPdate La 3yoon Batir Wardam.... Here's Batigol's goal against Barcelona, sorry no sound , really fanastic goal, http://youtube.com/watch?v=y2rgxlDem14

What a bloody aweful cell phone

Only in Lebanon!

If their president was just as honest....

If their president was just as honest, things would have been a little bit different

Any idea how to kill yourself?

I was about to see this young lady in the Emergency Room and I saw the nurse's short note "Patient here for suicidal attempt. Had a fight with her boyfriend then swallowed 8 pills of valium and drank half a bottle of vodka. She says "I want to die today" "

I checked her hospital chart, she had seven previous suicidal attempts in the past by swallowing a few pills and drinking alcohol. She always ends up being admitted for a month or so to the psychiatry unit then discharged home, then she would have a fight with someone and take a few pills and come to the hospital saying that she tried to commit suicide and that she wanted to die.
This seemed to never end.

My attending physician (my boss) caught me,
"So Masannat what's your plan for her?"
"I'll admit her to the ICU for observation tonight, if she's stable tomorrow she'll go to the psych unit"
"Cool, love this plan"
"I'll also tell her that our hospital has ten floors, if she decides next time to kill herself she should forget about the pills and go up the tenth floor and throw herself up from there".

I was excused from seeing her.

So how was school today?

Another usual day in Iraq....

Very Medical

In the clinic I was looking for a restroom, couldn't find any

then I found a room next to me , looked like a bathroom from inside, with a label on the door, "Micturition Room"

I asked another resident next to me, "Does this mean this is a bathroom?"

He said, "Yes, but it's just a micturition room, defecation is not allowed :) "

Snowing in the Desert

Enjoying their meal, watching a boring football game..... towards the end people stopped eating , and the waiters stopped walking around the tables. Everyone was looking outside in some sort of shock and joy, it was snowing.

Many people spend years and years in Tucson without seeing it, the climate here is much more hot than in Amman, last winter we had a total of 7-10 days of rain and that was it.

Snow is something people very rarely see. We did today. It was awesome.

Have you seen these pictures before?

Click on the pictures for a larger image

The Hijazi Railway in Ma'an - 1918

Stamp dedicated for the marriage of late King Hussein with Queen Dina -1955

Queen Zain El-Sharaf with Prince Hassan Bin Talal

Meeting In Basman Palace after a failed coup in 1958

King Hussein with King Faisal of Iraq in 1960


For more pictures you can check my previous posts from last year


Hay number ONE
Number Two
Number Three

How can you tell a Jordanian guy is looking for a wife?

It's also a rip-off , 13 dollars for a shirt and 6 dollars shipping, uffff!
Besides, my Jordan-will-win-the-2006-World-Cup is worthless now, although I was able to convince my neighbor that Jordan tops the world in football

Top Ten Reasons Why Jordan Should Have a Nuclear Program

Top ten reasons why Jordan should possess nucelar weapons
(I wrote these by the way)

1-If we make efficient nuclear bombs we can sell them for a good price to build another bridge in Abdoon

2- It will be a different topic to talk about other than the high prices and the influx of Iraqis.

3- Nuclear energy can destroy our women's fertility so they'd stop getting pregant ten times durig their life.

4- It will provide job opportunities for physics teachers in public schools who will otherwise die of starvation.

5- Nuclear explosions produce enormous amounts of heat which most Jordanians cannot afford in this cold winter.

6- Parliament members can use them to threaten each other in their daily fights in the Parliament.

7- It will provide a chance to check if anything can overcome the power of five men farting after finishing a meal at Hashim.

8- A way of following the steps of previous governments: spending lots of money on things that don't help people and will probably never be used.

9- When we're done building the nuclear reactor we can build a big mall next to it.

10- For protection: America can never attack us because it only attacks countries which do not possess weapons of mass destruction.

Hareega

Shake that thing

I was sitting on my sofa , watching TV, when I suddenly heard someone screaming from my neighbor's apartment.....

I think I heard a man screaming, then I heard my neighbor screaming...... then her dog started barking really loud.

I tried to listen to what they were talking, but couldn't.
Two minutes later, I heard screaming again, now I started getting worried.

Things got calm for a while, then I heard hims screaming again, this time real loud, he screamed again and again, the dog barking, and her daughter was screaming, saying words I could not hear clearly....
then the sound of glass breaking....
I was concerned, and I remembered my neigbors from the old apartment when a man used to beat his wife nonstop for the whole night, every single night, and she would beg him to stop and he never did.

He kept screaming really loud, and now I stopped hearing her voice, and I stopped hearing the daughter's voice, the dog stopped barking, and the man was the only once screaming, his voice shook the entire building.....

We share the same wall, and now I felt the wall shake, I didn't know what it was, but I was scared to death, I did not know what shook it , it could have been a body. Silence prevailed afterwards. I wanted to check if she was OK but was scared to death to do so.

I turned my TV off trying to hear anything, but I heard nothing, all was quiet.
I wasnn't sure if I should call 911 or not, I called my landlord but she was out of her office, I laid on the sofa, tried to resist falling alseep.....

I woke up 2 hours later, but did not hear anything. I had to leave for my later ER shift, wasn't sure if I should leave my apartment.

I opened my door quietly, walked a few steps outside, and with the edge of my eye took a quick look at her apartment.

I found her sitting with her boyfriend, her duagheter and the dog outside, smoking and drinking beer.

She said smiling, "Did you watch the game? The (Chicago) Bears won."

"Oh great , congratulations! " and I looked at her boyfriend with his "54" T-shirt , he looked at me, raised his hand, looked at the sky and screamed "Yeeeeeeeah man, we woooooooon"

I took off and thanked God everyone was still alive, thanx to the Bears.

Five things about me

I finally responded to a tag, yel3an ha!

Anyway.....

1- I was exposed to tear gases (3'azaat moseeleh lal dumoo3) a few times in my life, the first one when I was 14 in a football game (Yel3an abu el Faisali 3a abu el wehdaat)

2- When I was a young teen I used to write Sport articles in local Jordanian newspapers (Addustoor El Riyadi and Al Midaan Al Riyadi)

3-I love Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys and N-sync, damn I love their songs. I hate myself for that.

4- I once sued a guy by mistake. It was my first car accident and I wanted to make an accident report (Krookah) however I messed up the paper application and sued him by mistake. We had to go to the court in Salt to cancel the case. All I remember about that poor guy is that his mother's name was Ghanameh !!

5- Once in Chicago (when I was 20) at 3 am I was walking back to my apartment and I seriously had to pee so I turned around and did it in the beautiful Lake Michigan . I'm glad we were not caught by the cops or else I would have been charged with public exposure and nuditiy.

thanx oriental blog for the tag

The Jordanian and the Jew

I was doing my Thursday morning clinic, and a medical student joined me so I would teach her.

At the end of the day I was finishing my long notes and totally ignoring her because I wanted to leave early (yes I'm so irresponsible) , then she asked , "Your name is Egyptian, are you from there?"

"No, I'm from Jordan"

"Are you Palestenian?"I was thinking how stupid is she , "No, I'm from Jordan so I'm Jordanian"

"I mean originally, are you Jordanian or Palestenian"

Now I thought: I am stupid she is knowledgable.

"I know a lot about the region" she said, as I caught the name (Libermnan) on her name tag (Yes she was with me for 4 hours in the clinic and I didn't check her name)

then she continued, "My husband is from Israel, he's an orthodox Jew, and I'm very liberal, my parents were athiests, it's strange how we got together"


"So how did you guys meet?"

"It was an arranged marriage, just like the ones you have in Jordan, are you married?"

"No thank God"

"Isn't your mother looking for a young beautiful Jordanian woman for you, before you hook up with an American woman who can corrupt you?"

"I told her not to look for one, I'm not getting married now"


"Do you know Kareem the Moroccan guy in 3rd year?

"Yes"

"I was the one who hooked him with his fiancee Anglea, and they're getting married next week!!"

I looked at her and saw satisfaction in her eyes, reminiding me of our grandmothers who bragged about how many couples they have hooked together.

I told her, "Ya Bakht meen Jamma3 Rasain Bil Halaal" and added "that means good for you!"

She said, "Don't worry, I won't look for a Jewish girl for you, I don't want your mother to kill me hehehe"

"No but I'm fine now, I'm single and happy"

"What do you do in your free time?"

"I hang out with friends, watch TV..... and play computer games, just got a bunch of them from Jordan"

"Are they computer games where Hizbullah and Israel throw rockets on each other?"

"Nooooo, it's just football games although that rocket game could be fun"

"Did your mother visit you?"

"Yes she did last year"

"Where did she stay?"

"In my apartment, she was kinda upset that it wasn't very clean, so next day she did all the cleaning and cooked for me"

Then Liberman seemed a bit surprised , "Ooooh that is very Jewish"

"She said if I get married I'll have someone to cook for me and do laundry, and my whole life will become more organized, but she wants a decent girl whose parents are decent people. preferrably someone she knows"

"Oooooh that is very Jewish", she replied as I was packing my things and preparing to leave..... then she added, "maybe I'll start looking for a Jewish girl for you".

Happy Birthday Muhammad Ali

Flies like a butterfly ......
Stings like a bee
The greatest boxer of all times
His name is Muhammad Ali

--------------------------

Click to enjoy the clip of his famous knockout against George Foreman in the Rumble in the Jungle!!

Naughty

One of our patients was staying in the hospital for a few days for an infection in his leg. He is 77 years old.
He is a TV guy, so he brought his DVD player and own TV from home and was wathcing TV 24/7, fine.

One day I went inside and he he asked me to come back in 5 minutes because he really had to pee. HE did that once or twice after that, fine that happens often with other patients.

One night I went inside and he was sleeping on his bed, I looked at the TV and Oh, there was porn. I looked at the DVDs he got and they were all porn, the voulme was turned off.

I woke him up, and told him that this is totally inappropriate. I should have called security and they would have confescated the DVDs, but the little old man was apologitic and seemed very embaressed and I kinda felt sorry for him. He promoised to never do it again.

I switched hospitals in January and a new residenct took over my service. I met her today.

She said, "Do you know that one of my patients who's almost 80 still watches porn, he turns the volume down and watches porn all night!"

I asked, "Is that Mr. R*$#@ ??"

"Yes!"

My program director (who is himself 80 years old) was listening to us and said , "he might be old, but he's not dead"

The Most Fantastic Moments Ever

I had a similar thread last year and here is another of some of the most fantastic moments in the History of Sports, moments that will keep the most avid "Sport haters" watching, here they are in random, not in order, just the ten of them, all together.....



1- The Champion Dies Racing

Brazilian Aryton Senna was the world champion in Formula One, so popular that he started diverting his people from watching football into watching forumula one races. In 1994 he crashed his car in a race in Imola, Italy and died tragecially. Before his fatal accident he described the race circuit , "There are no small accidents on this circuit." Here's a short clip of the accident


2- Italy in 1990: Arrivederci
Italy hosted the World Cup in football in 1990 and seemed to be on its way to the final with great performances lead by 'Totò' Schillaci, Roberto Baggio and a record-breaking performance by keeper Walter Zenga. In the semi-finals against Argentina the final score was 1-1 and in the penalty kicks Argentina won after great saves from its keeper Goycochea.
Click here for a clip of the last penalty...


3- More than Perfect
Nadia Comaneci was the first gymnast to score a perfect 10 out of 10. Look at this clip and see how the score board was not set to give a score of 10.0 so it played 1.00, but the crowd understood that it was 10.0, the first perfect 10.0 in history.
She was 14.

4- Sex Bomb
Even if you're not into skating like I am, you gotta watch this. Evgeni Plushenko won the gold medal in the winter olympics in 2006 and was the world champion three times. Watch this outstanding and very creative PG-13 performance! This is one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen. Again, World Champion.

5- The Promised Land.... in Extra Time.
It was the Final Game in Europe's Champions League in 1999 between Byern Munich and Manchester United. The Germans were leading 1-0, the game was almost over , but in extra time two substitutes scored 2 goals from Manchester and the English team became Europe's champion. A real drama.

6- This man Eats Ears
I don't want you to get disgusted, but this was a shocking moment in Sports. Mike Tyosn bit off part of Hollyfield's ear on the ring and chewed it. Ewwwww. Glad it lasted only a few seconds. By the way tyson once said , "I wanna eat your heart, I wanna eat your children!" ... almost there.

7- Greece
Prior to 2004, you could have mentioned one thousand great things about Greece, but none of that would be their football team. In 2004 Greece, whose qualification to the final rounds came as surprise, shocked everyone and won the cup proving that anything whatsoever can happen in football.
Here's a clip of their winning goal in the final game against Portugal.


8- The Greatest Jump Ever
This is the best World Record ever set, most of us have not lived it. In the Olympic Games in 1968, Bob Beamon jumped for 8.90 meters setting a new world record that lasted for 23 years. As in Comanecci's case, the measuring device was not prpeared to record a number that high that time, so the referees showed three numbers which sum up to 8.90!!
Here's a clip of the greatest jump of all, colored!


9- The Hand of God

Maradona used his hand to score against England in 1986. The referee (Ben Ali) did not see the hand and gave him the goal. A few minutes later Maradona went ahead and scored the best goal in the history of football.

10- Ronaldinho's Special
This was in the Quarter-finals of 2002 against England. The goal speaks for itself.

----------------

I hope you enjoyed them......
Hareega

Faisali, unbeatable in Arabia

Al-Faisali is playing in the Final-8 round of the Arab Champions Cup and kicking some ass

Defeated the champions of Saudi Arabi (El Naser), Kuwait (Kuwait) and yesterday defeated Algeria's champs (W.Sateef)

Now leading its group with a perfect 9 points out of 9 possible.

Nothing is more perfect than that

In the middle of the night

"Am I boring?"

"Am I boring".... I heard it again, and wasn't sure if he was repeating it or was it just the resonance of his voice in my head. I opened my eyes and thought if it was just a dream. NO! He's sitting here in front of me, smiling, and asked again , "Am I boring?"

I realized it was not a dream. I looked at my watch and it was 1.40 AM, good it was only 2 or 3 minutes. That was the first time , and only time so far, that I fell asleep while talking to a patient.

The patient could have kicked my ass, he could have filed a complaint or even sued me but instead he apologized for being boring, he thought that made me sleep. I told him it was OK and kept talking as if nothing happened.

It's ironic how I move from one bed to another while at work but cannot crash on one bed of these to take a short nap during a long night of work.
I remembered how a medical resident in another hospital got sued by a lady because he fell asleep on her chest during a physical exam.
After 30 hours of continuous work, don't expect me to be awake.

The disaster is driving back home after those 30-36 hours of nonstop work. Sometimes I take a short nap in my car before I drive, but I realized that made me more sleepy. Sometimes I play Hakeem or Heavy Metal in my car to keep me up but this music just causes me severe diarrhea. I haven't crashed my car yet, but I once missed the turn to house and kept driving straight in the street because I was.... sleeping. Two residents with me had serious nonfatal car accidents because of DUILOS (Driving under the influence because of lack of sleep)- I made up this term.

It happens with me all the time. My barber had to wake me up a couple of times after finishing the haircut because he had other customers waiting. I would order something to take-away at a restaurant, go back to my car take a ten-minute nap which would last an hour and a half only to come back to find a new person at the counter who doesn't know what the hell happened with my order.

But what sucks, what truly sucks, is when I come back home wearing my clean shirt and tie with a big meal to eat, turn on TV, start eating and suddenly fall asleep. I would wake next morning, with ketchup on my shirt, the TV still on, and I got paged by my intern because it's 7 am and I'm already late.

I'm not complaining. This is a job that I chose and I was expecting this, but in case you were driving in the street and saw someone crossing 2 red lights and terrorising pedestrians, or if you were sleeping in the hospital and I come over and take a nap in your lap, or I smell like baked potatoes with ketchup drooling from my hair.... I hope you'll understand.

? من نحن ?

نحن امة لا تختار زعمائها

لا تختار من سيحكم و لكم سيحكم وكيف سيحكم

نعرف الحاكم جيدا لكنه لا يعرفنا

نغير الدستور كي يناسبه بدلا من ان يتغير هو كي يناسب الدستور
نخافه كثيرا بدلا من ان يخاف منا

و بدلا من ان نحاسبه نحاسب من يحاسبه

نكذب انفسنا بدلا من ان نكذبه
نرقص له ونغني لبقائه

واذا ما جاء غريب واطاحه

نرقص على رفاته ونغني لرحيله
ونستقبل الطاغية الجديد بالزغاريد والقبل

ونغير الدستور ونغير انفسنا

ونغير المدن واالاحياء واسماء اطفالنا وشوارعنا

ونغير الحدود ومجاري الانهار

ونغير ابعاد الكرسي المخملي لكي يناسب ابعاد قفاه العملاقة التي ستلتصق به لفترة طويلة جدا

نغير الوطن والدنيا كلها الا هو..... لا يتغير

How some tyrants end

Augusto Pinochet

A man who overthrow an elected government
became a dictator
killed his opponents and tortued his people for 17 years
Introduced the mass graves to Chile (check this video)
Finally..... he was removed from power
and the time has come for the tyrant to pay the price of his crimes
So he was

Excused from the trial

Left alone

and when he died of natural causes, got a military funeral

Closing Jordan Planet: Wrong Decision

There's nothing to justify closing Jordan Planet. The quality of posts have not really detoriorated from before but it's now harder to follow. In case the administration felt there were too many blogs, it could have simply frozen some blogs especially those inactive ones, or restrict posting to a certain number of posts per week or month, or come up with different suggestions.

If it was to make a new design for the planet, that could have been done without shutting down the site for six months, and if the bloggers were asked I'm almost certain they'd prefer keeping Jordan Planet rather than closing it for six month to add new colors.

Besides, the old Jordan Planet where the front page was full of picutres was much more attractive to read than the most recent where almost no photos would appear on the front page.

I really don't know who's running the planet other than Isam, he did a wonderful job creating the planet, and if needed help I'm sure many bloggers would be more than happy to, but closing down the site seems like avoiding solving a problem rather than dealing with it.

Again, if there are other reasosns for closing JP we need to know.

America needs Sawsan Tuffaha

The cable news channels in the US are useless. You watch the news bulletin for one hour and it would be interrupted at least five times by commercials, and the news itself is just one line followed by different headlines in big fonts and arrows and colors then appear a few people to discuss the story. It doesn't matter who these people are, nobody knows, but they need to have different points of view and the viewer is to take sides. That makes the news exciting! The problem is that it's really difficult tot tell what the piece of news was. Among all of these debates you really miss the actual news.

What's worse? the news itself. Celebrities get most of the attnetion, the stupid legal cases that affect nobody like a missing girl in Aruba or three college students raping a strip dancer and this news took more space than the war in Iraq and definitely than news in any other area in the world.

The Sawsan-Tuffaha news is the one when someone who doesn't smile or frown shows up on a TV screen at a certain time, shoots the news for 20 minutes straight in your face, nonstop, no commercials, all serious news, and celebrties are mentioned in it only when they die. News are not enjoyable anyway, you'd be a moron to enjoy watching news about wars and earthquakes but that's the news and that's how it's supposed to be.

Many Americans are getting their news first from comedians like Jay Leno and Bill Maher even the Jon Stewart before they get it from what's supposed to be the real news channels!

America needs Sawsan Tuffaha.

--------------------------------

Here's of clips from Jon Stewart making fun of cable news, hilarious!!

A Christmas Diary

It was mid-December and I haven't decided yet what I should do for Christmas. I remembered my first Christmas in the US which I spent with my gay friend and his lover, and that time I made a decision not to spend any Christmas in Arizona anymore. I bought a super-expensive ticket to Chicago to visit my sister there. Cool.

Next... Gifts, yes I gotta get some gifts... Let's see , I was overloaded with work from Dec 5th till the 23 rd with NO DAYS OFF at all. The only day when I could shop was the 24th, the day of my flight. My flight was scheduled at 6 pm, so I had some time to shop in the morning.

I woke up at 9, watched TV and played FIFA World Cup 2006 and won the cup again with Argentina, and this time I defeated Brazil 11-0 in the final. Although that was the 46th time that I win with Argentina, I am still celebrating everytime they win by kicking the sofa 12 repetitive times and jumping on my bed for 5 minutes and, occasionally, running to my patio and screaming "3aaaaaaaa" until my neighbor's dog starts barking. Now it's 11am and I'm really screwed because I had to drive to the airport in Phoenix and that takes 2 hours (unless you're drunk then it's 1 hour 15 minutes) and I still have to do my Christmas shopping. I took a quick shower and was about to leave, then I heard a knock on my door. It was my neighbor. I opened the door...

"Hi" she said, and the smell of beer spread across my apartment and filled it replacing the smell of the old rotten yogurt I bought in August and was too lazy to throw away.

She continued, "listen, I know you're going to Chicago, Chris (her boyfriend) is a crazy Chicago Bears' fan , he wants that Bears cap that Snoop dogg wears in his last video".

"How does the cap look like?"

"I don't know, I don't watch Snoop Dogg, but it's black and covered with red in the front and has a big red C on it, it's not orange, it's red, and the C is different from C in Cubs. Chris told me that cap looks naaaasty!"

"Do you know what's the video? I can check it on youtube"

"It has tam tam tana tana in it" then she started moving her head circumferentially.

"But there's like 5 million songs that have tam tam tana tana in them!"

"Let's google it"

I googled everything and went to the Chicago Bear's website and couldn't find the freakin cap she was talking about, and somehow I convinced her that the Chicago Bears made Snoop Dogg a special cap just for that clip.

"Now what should I get him for the new year? He loves the bears"

I felt sorry for her, so I searched ebay for the Bears products and found a T-shirt for their star Brian Urlacher with a print on it "Brian Urlacher will make you his bitch"!! She was sooooo happy when she found it and she bought it.

Now it was 12.30, I called my friend in Phoenix and he told me to come early so we can hang out together before the flight. I went to the Mall on my way and did my Christmas shopping in 20 minutes. I was in Phoenix by about 3.

I called my friend on his cell.... no answer.
I called again... wala eshi

I rang the bell of his house, nobody opened.
I was about to open the door and go check inside, but I remembered there was another guy living with him with a 3agel karaki who's never met me, and maybe if he sees me coming in like that he might grab his gun and shoot me in the face. Retrospecitvely I know now that he was sleeping. I did not come in. I called another friend, we had lunch then I headed toward the airport.

I was supposed to go to terminal 4 but I went to terminal 3 instead. I thought to myself "ma howeh kulhom terminals" . I parked there. I'm not sure if there's a longterm parking but if there was one I did not use it. I parked in the regular parking where they charge your ass 3 dollars an hour. I was short of time so I just parked and took my two carry-ons and left. I realized that when you're supposed to go to terminal 4, you need to park there. I had to take a bus to terminal 4 and that wasted a lot of time.

I arrived at the security check and stood in the line. My Arab paranoia started to kick in. I remembered that some airports in the US started to hire specialists in psychological profiling. These people observe the behavior of the passengers standing in security checkups and if they a strange behavior they'd take the passenger and search him very carefully and ask him a zillion questions. Just knowing that someone might be observing me made me nervous, and now I thought to myself, "I'm a young Arab male with an Arabic passport traveling on Christmas Eve, alone, not even carrying my passport or any of my work documents, and totally unshaven, add to that that my karsh gives the impression that I'm hiding four explosive belts. " I thought that if I was one of those who do psychological profiling I would definitely stop "me" and ask myself questions.

Then I remembered that I put my shaving razor inside my carry-on. Oops! Is that allowed? I didn't now and still don't know, but that just worsened my paranoia. I kept smiling and smiling and I was smiling even more that how much late Rafe3 Shaheen would smile for a female contestant. I passed through security in less than 30 seconds, no questions asked, no carry-ons opened or searched. My only thought was "these security people let me pass smoothly, they need some extra training".

I arrived at the gate at 6.25, my flight was scheduled to take off at 6.35 and yes it did. I was the last passenger to check in! I was totally surprised. It was a Southwest flight and on Christmas eve and still took off on time. In case you've never traveled Southwest, it works like the public buses, whoever gets in the plane first would sit where he likes, and it might stop on its way to drop and pickup passengers without changing planes. The flight went fine, except when I had to use their extremely tiny one restroom shared by the 150 passengers on the plane. I'll try not to be very graphic, but when a male is releasing his liquidish product of metabolism, he has to point well down to where it is supposed to land, and with all the turbulences during the flight nothing of that was possible. Looking at how the restroom looked like whenI went in, I was sure that at least five men had that same problem before me.

I arrived, it was nice to meet the family. Today was Christmas and we went to have the Christmas lunch at the house of my brother-in-law's aunt who lost her husband last month, so the whole family in Chicago (over 40 people) went to her house for lunch.

On the way there I asked my brother-in-law, "What should I tell them there, Merry Christmas or Yeslam Raasko (sorry for your loss)?

He replied," Say Merry Christmas, her husband died more than a month ago, and it's Christmas now, say Merry Christmas"

then my sister interrupted , "you should say Yeslam Raasko, because so far you haven't paid condolences and this is your first visit there, so we should say Merry Christmas but you're supposed to say Yeslam raasko"

then my brother-in-law said, "Listen habibi, people will greet you first, and they will say Merry Christmas first, so you can just reply back with Merry Christmas"

I was still confused about what to say, so when I got there I decided not to say anything. I just shook hands and nodded my head and made some sounds with my mouth with a lot of "Sh" and "S' and "e3" and believe me when you say these words in a low voice repetitively while nodding your head they would give the impression that you are saying real words of a greeting that the other person cannot hear. Surprisingly, you'll find the other person nodding his head and saying words that you cannot understand.

Then came a young man and handled me a cup of coffee (gahweh sadah), and the dilemma was whether or not I should shake the cup when I'm done and what to say, Merry Christmas or Yeslma Raasko. It shouldn't sound that bad except that there were all these men who I barely know watching me and I felt that if I made a mistake they'd be talking about it up until the next Christmas (and their wives would talk about it forever). The man who gave me the coffee stood next to me waiting for me to finish it. I drank the coffee really slowly, thinking of should I do. I thought about dropping that cup and breaking it and pretend it was an accident, but the floor was covered with carpet, it wouldn't break. Then, thank God, that man turned his head to he other side to look for something, and in the blinking of an eye I extended my hand to the nearby table and landed the cup of coffee there.

We had lunch, a damn good one, and just before I left the unbelievable happened again, another man came next to me and handled me another cup of coffee. I took the coffee, drank it, but this time the man did not leave or turn his head, he was standing in front of me as if he was saying ,"and now what will you do ya tabara?"

I drank the coffe, then looked at the man and handled him the cup as I was saying "esh" and "e3" and "ess" while nodding my head, gave him a smile, and then asked my brother-in-law about when are we going to leave.

I love Christmas :)

Merry Christmas

Bethlehem in 1896

-----------------------------

"People continue to die of hunger and thirst, disease and poverty, in this age of plenty and of unbridled consumerism"......

That was a good reminder on a Christmas Eve!

Merry Christmas

Try this at home

I was called at 6 in the morning to admit this old man to the ICU because he couldn't breathe. The ER doctor was very concerned because he was having angioedema.
Angioedema is a very rapid swelling of the throat which usually results from an allergy. This man started to take a new medication a day before that he was allergic to, so his neck swelled up in a few minutes and he came to the ER.

I went to see him. He could not talk at all, his tongue and the entire neck were massively swollen. He tried to speak but no words came out. The biggest concern was for his throat to completely close up and he would then stop breathing. That was a matter of time, probably a few minutes.

To prevent him from dying we had to make a big hole (called tracheostomy) in his neck to allow him to breathe. Cool. The only problem is that I don't know how to make this hole, I've never done it and never will, I'm not trained to and I'm not officially supposed to. I turned to the ER doctor and asked him about it, and I could see him almost shitting in his pants because he didn't know how to do it either. We had to call the specialist and bring him from home to do it. That would usually take at least half an hour to do and by then the patient would be in heaven singing with angels.

We gave the patient a bunch of medications and we were hoping they would still work. We gave extra doses of each medication and still waited to see some improvement. Time passed and the old man started to breathe better... good, then he started talking and that was great. An hour later he was able to speak well so by the time the surgeon arrived to the hospital in his pyjama there was no need to stick a knife in the man's throat.

The old man told me the story

"I woke up with this pain in my neck. I couldn't move it and I felt I was losing my breath"

"So did you call 911 for help?"

"No, I couldn't speak, if I called them what the hell was I gonna say, I couldn't say anything"

"Well sir if you would have called 911 and you didn't say anything they will locate your address and come in to your place"

"Oh, I didn't know that!"

"Ok so what did you do, how did you come in to the hospital? Did someone drive you here"

"No, I drove myself, but I didn't know the address to the hospital, it's been a long time since I've been here"

"Did you drive here while you were out of breath"

"Yes I had to, I didn't find another way, the problem is that I forgot how to get in"

"What did you do?"

"I stopped by a couple who were jogging and asked them for directions"

"But you couldn't talk....."

"That's right, but I had a pen, I wrote my questions down on a piece of paper "How do I get to the VA Hospital?"

"Wow...."

" ....but the couple did not the address, they told me it's in the South but they didn't exactly where. "

"So what did you do? Did you ask other people?"

"No, it was 5 in the morning and the street was empty, so I went back home and checked the address on the internet and got in here"

"where you out of breath all this time?"

"Yes, I felt I was gonna die, but I had to do something"

"If this happens next time, call 911 immediately and they'll come pick you up"

"What if they I didn't have a phone around?"

"We will give you allergy needles, if you couldn't breathe grab one of these needles and inject yourself with them until you get to the hospital"

"What if they did not work"

I thought for a second then told him, "then grab a knife a stick it in the middle of your neck, that's where your breathing tube is located, and this can help you breathe. With all honesty that's exactly what we were about to do in the emergency room"

I was waiting for him to ask ,"what if there was no knife around" but he didn't. He seemed to really like the idea of stabbing his neck with a knife.

He did well overnight and we discharged him home the following day.....

I just hope that he doesn't come one day to the ER with a knife sticking out of his throat and him wiriting on a piece of paper , "this is not working, what should I do now?"

Good-bye Tom and Jerry

Very few men could come up with something that would unite the whole world
One of these men, Joe Barbera, died last night in LA.
Enjoy one of his clips......

Gimme a break

I admitted a patient one month ago to the hospital as a favor for the on-call team because they were very busy. He had a pneumonia (lung infection). Next day another team took over his care, I was expecting him to get better and leave in a couple of days.

Two weeks after that I was passing by and I found his name on the board. I was surprised he was still in the hopsital.

For a second I was concerned I made a mistake when I admitted him, "Have I missed something?? Did this man have a heart attack that I missed??"

I checked with his nurse.

"Hey why is Mr. X still here, I admitted him 2 weeks ago!"

"Yeah doc something happened in the hospital"

"What?"

"Do you know nurse Glory doc?"

" Nurse Glory.... yeah I think so" and I was thinking of that chubby nurse who works in that section

" She was changing his IV doc, and she slipped, and she fell real hard doc, real hard"

" Wow! Is she OK"

"Yes she is , but Mr. X is not, she fell down on him doc, poor guy, she broke his hip, he got a DVT now (blood clot) and he can't walk"

"And how's his pneumonia"

"It's good doc, you fixed his lungs doc"

"That's good, now you gotta call someone to fix his hip"

Truth fears no questions

"Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom"

~Thomas Jefferson

Thank you Jimmy Carter

On Bush's visit to Jordan

In Jordan we make everyone feel like he's home.....