Thursday, September 04, 2008

Vegas-iyyat

At the New York Hotel with a friend, there's a roller coaster

Friend, "Yalla let's go ride the roller coaster"
Hareega, "No I'm fine thanks"
Friend, "Yalla let's go"

So we went up the stairs. I started hearing the screams of people on the roller coaster.
Friend told the operator, "We need 2 tickets"
I told him, "No just one ticket, I'm fine man, I'll stay down here"
Friend pulled me to the side, "Malak? Let's go"
"No I don't want to"
"Why? Don't tell me you're scared?"
"Of course not, there are little kids riding it. I'm not scared, but people can throw up when they ride these. I don't want to throw up"
"But have you eaten anything today"
"No but I can still throw up. I also don't fit into these small carts"
"No you do, here's a guy who just was on the roller coaster and his ass size is twice yours, I'm sure they can squeeze your ass into one of them"
"I just don't feel like riding them. It's for little kids. I'd rather stay here. Go have fun"
"No I'm getting you a ticket. I'll pay for it. It's fun"
"No don't"
"No I'll get one"
"No don't get one. I'm not going up there"
"No you will"
"Ok listen. I always shit in my pants when I ride these things, then start crying like a baby and get nightmares for a week"

Morale: Sometimes you got to make embarrassing confessions to avoid publicly humiliating yourself.
----------------------------

I was in the shuttle heading to the airport.

The driver was asking everyone where they were from.

"So you in the blue shirt back there, where are you from sir?"
" Jordan"
"I don't know where that is?"
My father was sitting next to me, he told the driver, "Do you know King Hussein?"
The driver, "Yeah, of course I know King Hussein... I know him"
then paused a little bit, gave it a little thought and kept going, "It was really harsh to execute him that way"
----------------------------

February 2008
Super Bowl
I was driving to Vegas with a friend.

We knew the super bowl was taking place in Phoenix.
We also knew that day was the super bowl.

On our way to Vegas, we passed by Phoenix. Beautiful Stadium. Plenty of traffic.

"Why is there so much traffic on a Sunday?"
"Not sure, must be a big game or something"

Arrived in Vegas,
People stacked in bars watching a football game.

I asked, "That must be the super bowl right?"
Friend, "Yes. And it's in Phoenix this year, in that nice stadium they have in Glendale"
I said, "O I know it. Been there before, saw the US playing Mexico. Nice stadium"
-"Indeed".

10 comments:

Unknown said...

lol @ stadium story (blonde moment... You were in New York? horayyy! so Hareega, you're scared? heheh

Anonymous said...

"Sometimes you got to make embarrassing confessions to avoid publicly humiliating yourself."

yeah, I'd never get on a roller coaster because i do know that i'll be throwing up once it stops.. ewwwww, I know!

also, I avoid watching horror movies because I have the worst nightmares afterward!

Ali Dahmash said...

I tried the roller coaster at New York New York in Vegas, it was an easy ride ;) There is a great one on the starsophere or whatever that tower is called, I didnt do it, my friend did

NasEr said...

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO ! US w Mexico ah :DDDDDDDDD

But its true,everyone had heard of King Hussien ,when i need to identify where I'm from,its one of two : one might know who King Hussien was and go "yea yea King Hussien" ,or, "Next to Israel and Iraq" !

Anonymous said...

LOL, 3anjad enta shway blonde, Hareega. Plus wonderfully humble.

I throw up on roller coasters, that usually keeps people from pressuring me to go on them. And I can't watch horror movies, either!

Hareega said...

batoul, i get scared easily , not an easy confession to make

secratea.. good to know i'm not alone

ali... yes they have a big roller coaster there

naser... those 2 work very well, you can also try "where Al-Azqrqawi came from" but that can start giving you problems at international aiprorts

kinzi... haven't thrown up yet but i'm at a stage where i can resist the pressure to go on them. What's the point of them anyway?? You pay a lot of money and stand in a very long line to get 2 minutes of absolute horror when you know you're not gonna get hurt. If they wanted real horror they should try Southwest (and their ride is even cheaper than a roller coaster riide)

Anonymous said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

I never went to any amusement park after the age of 13, they're not amusing, they're scary and dangerous and stupid.

I guess they assume that the K word only exists in middle eastern countries that were "liberated" by the Americans and in fairy tales. Whenever asked about Jordan I used to explain a lot about King Hussain, King Abdullah, Queen Rania, The Dead Sea / Davos, the neighboring countries including Iraq and Palestine, halla2 I just tell people to look it up on the internet if they're interested, they're ignorant and it's not my fault nor is it my obligation to explain to them that Jordan is a country and we do not live in tents or ride camels.

Anonymous said...

'You pay a lot of money and stand in a very long line to get 2 minutes of absolute horror when you know you're not gonna get hurt.'

LOL Hareega, you are hilarious. I hate roller coasters, it is good to know that I am not the only one :\

Hareega said...

khouloud... I still do a lot of exlplaining, sometimes I just can't resist explaining especially when someone thinks Jordan is Israel. The movie Borat was really funny because some people in the film did actually believe Borat did the things he was talking about in the movie (buy women, put his retarded brother in a cage and show him at a circus, place his feces in a bag and bring them to his host at the dinner table)...etc

Hala.. no you're not the only one, lazem ne3mal jam3iyyeh mokafa7et al jabal al roosi

Anonymous said...

The second story is very funny. Thanks!